nyata

aku menarik diriku dari keramaian.

suasana disana menyesakkan. layaknya mereka bahagia sekali.

aku iri.

apa yang mereka pasang menyerukan kedudukan.

swafoto saja serupa.

ah akui saja. aku lemah.

aku tidak sepandai mereka menunjukkan ekspresi.

aku tidak serajin mereka memperlihatkan posisi.

aku dibawah. mereka tidak.

melengkapinya dengan kesunyian menjadikanku sempurna.

oh iya. bukankah kamu harusnya mendukungku?

tetapi kamu menambah keterpurukanku.

dan menjauh.

aku menarik diriku dari kenyataan.

suasana disana seram. layaknya tidak cocok untukku.

aku takut.

bolehkah aku...

love

you let me in
i wander every single cells you had
and poisoned from what i had
then manifested into mine

i gave you sparks
it'll felt electric
rushes from top to bottom
thrilled

after that
i gave you warm
embraced you really tight
you forgot about
numbness you had
that made you cold

oh it's a brief moment
that later
genuine self reappear
crushed you from inside

too comforted
unaware of the real pain
and when the time come
it worst
than earlier
i turned black

you dying
but none knew
because the smile you plastered

and none beside you
because he
that bring me
left you

walk alone
always
and someone treated you
go back up again
and repeat
hello again it's me

you didn't learn
did you?

current feels

O wishes came true

felt happy will do

days passes

part ways faces

insecure rushes

sooth words calms

some words struck

left mind in shock

silence

solitude

and sadness

within

i like it

the way you appreciate things

every detailed

every imperfections

you still respectful

is it how it works?

your mind and your love?

i never heard love words from you

but the way you gaze

how you touch

you might accept me physically

in spite of you teased about my curve

still your fingers trails above my skin

admiring every inch of it

but i don't know you do so to my soul

do you?

misunderstood

I love making people happy
Talk about something in common
Or passionately discuss on random things
It's freshen your mind

Sad
It's because I talk to opposite gender?
Some people don't understand

They say I'm so bitchy about it
Don't they the one who so bitchy?
Backstabbing and talk behind

Realize
It's so common when girls talk
Where they're gonna headed
Boys, gossips, makeups, dresses
Bleh! Mundane

Sparks

there was the time i read somewhere

"when you start over, you fall in love all over again.

 not continue what's left, but start from the first"

i understood casually
but then i realized, i was wrong
not long ago

hence, i'm curious who healed shortly
like how?
wasn't it cut too deep or just a scratch?

true. those quotation.
you need a spark again.
you should do so.

then, how to keep that spark?
especially, when you tied the knot.
how to fall in love all over again everyday?

Bewitched

You were the one who doesn’t believe in relationship
You were the one who told me a beauty didn’t pleased you
You were the one who told me a richer didn’t amused you
You were the one who told me a throne didn’t satisfied you
And you were the one, the last time you told me, you’ve felt something different
But, you seem leave it unnoticed
You were the one who told me that it was me who did it
Flabbergasted. Blushed. Thrilled.
It was soon gone
Like you are always done
Then it comes again
You once shared, direct, a beautiful phrase
Leave me questioning

Why?
I questioned myself and finally, I’m asking
You just, again, leave me questioning